Self-Care Isn’t Selfish

self care woman having a cup of tea with her feet up

We all have moments when we feel like we can’t manage as parents and carers. That we are incapable. That there is too much to do, and it is overwhelming.

Perhaps your inner voice is telling you:

  • ‘I can’t do this’
  • ‘I’m no good at this’ 
  • ‘Why is this so hard?’
  • ‘What am I doing wrong?!’
  • ‘I can’t keep up’
  • ‘Tell me what I am doing wrong and how to do it right!’

This is something all of us experience from time to time. Everyone has moments when they feel frustrated and full of doubt. It’s natural, but that doesn’t make it easy to manage.

We also have moments that are fine. All is well. We tell ourselves: ‘I can do this’, ‘I am doing this’. ‘What was I worrying about?’ Much of the time, we are not even aware of what we are thinking because we are just getting on with parenting and day to day things.

9 ways to prioritise self-care

So, how can we cope when it’s all too much? We’ve got simple ideas to help.

1: Breathe

It sounds simple, but focusing on your breathing can how a powerful effect on your feelings. Consciously try to take slower, deeper breaths in and out for a few minutes. Let your body calm down and begin to relax.

Thinking about your breathing before rushing into deal with a crisis, stop children bickering, or having an argument with your child helps you regulate yourself so you can better support your child.

2: Talk

Think of someone who will listen to you. Someone you know will be available and either help you work it through or just listen without judging. A ‘problem shared is a problem halved’ is often true.

If you’re struggling to find someone to talk to, try writing down how you’re feeling. The free My Family Journal app is a great tool for this and completely private. Alternatively, try recording a voice note to yourself. You could always delete it afterwards.


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